Thursday, February 22, 2007

A Weaned Child

Zero to sixty in 1.4 seconds! This passage came to mind today...
My heart is not proud, LORD, my eyes are not haughty; I do not concern myself with great matters or things too wonderful for me. But I have stilled and quieted my soul; like a weaned child with its mother, like a weaned child is my soul within me. ...Put your hope in the LORD both now and forevermore. -Psalm 131 This came to mind in contrast with Chloe's typical feeding behavior, especially in the last few days. Another translation represents the last line of verse 2 as, "like a weaned child I am content." So far from that is Chloe! Her hunger cues aren't too demanding until she's in position. Then, it seems, she suddenly realizes that it's time to eat, and she's hungry, she's hungry, she's HUNGRY HUNGRY HUNGRY HUNGRY HUNGRY HUNGRY HUNGRY HUNGRY HUNGRY!!!!!!!! And she always has been, she always will be, and she is starving nigh unto death!!! When the blessed breast, the Giver of Milk, does appear, she approaches it with such desperation that she nearly misses her meal - fists flying, she hits herself in the face and more often than not ends up latching onto a fist, only spit it out screaming when it refuses to provide her with the much-desired milk. At not-quite-three-weeks of age, she has yet to learn to trust us. Of course we'll feed her; always. But she doesn't know this yet - and that's okay. She has plenty of time to learn. Will the same type of frantic desperation still be okay in six months, or a year? Well, no; in fact, it may be a cause for concern. Not because we're any less willing to feed her, but because by that time she can be reasonably expected to know that she can trust us to feed her and to calm herself accordingly (not to say that we won't get a tantrum if a meal is too slow in coming, but that I don't expect the immediate panic I see now). The psalmist, too, has learned to calm himself and rest in the belief that God is trustworthy. Rather than trying to control things beyond his control, rather than worrying about events that surround him or agonizing over personal fears and ambitions, he has calmed and quieted himself. Not without reason: he has chosen God's ambitions over his own, trusting God to provide and direct as God sees fit. He no longer comes frantically to God with his pressing and passing concerns, shouting in desperation and fear that he won't be heard. He's learned that the fearful desperation accompanying Chloe's cries for "MILK MILK MILK MILK MILK!" causes him to dive into his own fists and miss the meal that God has prepared. This season of Lent, I'd like to focus more on stilling myself before God. While I don't think I approach him with the frantic desperation I see in Chloe when she's looking for a meal, I also don't have the stillness of spirit that the psalmist describes here. I'll try to keep you posted with any progress. :)

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7 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Scripture that comes to mind is somthing like, 'The parents have eaten sour grapes and put their children's teeth on edge,' but in this case, the poor kid ain't got no teeth. On a side note, why are these doting parents playing with a camera while their child is in extremis? But on the other hand, keep snapping those pictures, we'll run interference with the Nippon Child Protective League.

2/22/2007 09:35:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

By the way bloggors and bloggettes, Chloe's mom has a birthday coming up, tomorrow the 23rd of February, which, in Japan, is in 15 minutes. It's also a humungous birthday (hint - it's the one that comes 365 days after the twenty-ninth one), so undelurk yourself once more with appropriate felicitations.

2/22/2007 09:46:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Happy 30th Birthday, Meika. It's such good timing to have a baby shortly before such an auspicious birthday so you hardly have time to think about how old you are getting! Wishing you a great day and many, many more birthdays!
love,

Aunt Mary & Uncle Gord

2/22/2007 10:50:00 AM  
Anonymous Luge Schempr said...

Congratulations, Meika and Mike. It's great to hear your good news and see what's going on with you.
Luge Schemper

2/22/2007 07:32:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dearest Birthday-Girl Meika,

I miss you so much. I loved loved loved your pictures and post. I laughed and laughed out loud in my office (while pumping breastmilk, mind you) as I read about Chloe's desperation. Tim and I have used the phrase "0 to 60" many, many times to describe Samara's frantic eating needs... So many times I've tried to explain to her that she can trust me... Never have I so beautifully reflected that this is a picture of our relationship to our heavenly provider. Wow... you are such a poet, such a theologian.

I love you tons...

Heidi

2/23/2007 01:16:00 PM  
Blogger Ben Wildeboer said...

Happy Birthday!!

The big 3-0!!

2/23/2007 08:00:00 PM  
Blogger Meika said...

Thanks for the comments and birthday wishes! Especially good to hear from you, Luge and Heidi!!! :) More photos of baby in extremis coming soon...

2/27/2007 03:13:00 AM  

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